11 Things You Shouldn't Tolerate In A Relationship

We all know in a relationship not everything is butterflies and sunshine, there will be times when you are going to be annoyed by your partner or you are going to disagree on something, however, there are some behaviors that are often labeled as “normal” or “part of a relationship” which I find quite upsetting because it shouldn’t be consider normal at all. You have the right to get out of a relationship if it makes you more miserable than happy. Here are the things you shouldn’t never tolerate in a relationship, doesn’t matter how much you think you love that person:

1. Insults/Mocking/Calling names: There will be times when you are going to be mad at your partner, most of the time it will be about silly things like disagreeing about where to go eat or they misplacing something that is yours, and usually after a while you just let it go but if your partner seems to get extremely irritable about the little things even to the point that they yell at you and insult you or call you names to humiliate you, this is not normal and it can escalated into something worse like actual physical abuse. Also, a person who does that definitely doesn’t respect you.

2. Disagreements about important things: Disagreements are normal and they are going to come, doesn’t matter how similar you two are, you are going to disagree in something someday, usually these disagreements doesn’t affect the relationship because they are about things that you can make compromises but when the disagreements are about topics that are consider deal breakers for example; religion, politics, marriage and children, it can be quite difficult to keep the relationship stable because it will be hard to get to a happy medium. An example would be that you want to get married and your partner doesn’t, this usually doesn’t end well because no matter how much you try, you just can’t change someone’s else mind.

3. Ignoring your calls/texts: Sometimes we are busy, sometimes we forget to return calls or texts for a couple of hours or we are either busy or don't feel to talk in that moment,  but if this become a pattern or it changes suddenly, then there might a problem. Lets say, your partner used to text you everyday and all of the sudden, they started doing it every other day and then once a week, this is not good at all, doesn’t matter what excuse they give. If we call or text them and they can’t reply at the moment, its normal to take a few hours but if they take a whole day or more to text back, this is definitely something that you shouldn't tolerate and it might indicate that this person is too busy but for you.

4. Extreme jealousy – It is normal to feel a bit of jealousy at times especially when your partner is talking to someone attractive from the opposite sex, what is not normal its when this jealousy goes to the extreme, when your partner causes scenes, insults you and controls you. If your partner gets so jealous that they don’t want you to hang out with friends or talk to them, this is controlling behavior and it means they don’t trust you at all.

5. Controlling behavior - The last thing an introvert needs, its someone who wants to control your life, if your partner was to be in controlled of everything that happens in the relationship and always want to have the final word, this is very dangerous. The controlling behavior might start with small things like getting mad when you don’t answer the phone, wanting to know at all times what you are doing and who you are with, then they will want to control how you dress, who is your friend, where do you go and more. This is the description of an abusive relationship and no one deserves to go through that.

7. Physical abuse – You should never ever tolerate physical abuse, it doesn’t matter if it was just once and they claim it will never happen. Once your partner puts a hand on you, its time to run and never look back.

8. Cheating – Exactly like physical abuse, once it happens, it will keep happening. People don’t simply change, and the old phrase, is quite true, “once cheater, always a cheater”.

9. Lies – They might start giving “white little lies”, you know, small things like lying about where they were the night before but keep in mind that these lies will keep escalating into something worse, to the point, when you wouldn’t be able to trust that person anymore.

10. Blaming – If your partner blames you for everything all the time even things that are actually their fault, this person is not worth it and definitely doesn’t care about you. In a healthy relationship, there is no blaming, and disagreement and resolved by talking, if someone is guilty, they apologize for it.

11. Not caring for your needs – We all have needs. We have the need to loved, to be respected, to be heard.  As introverts, we also have the need for alone time and its important that your partner understand that and don't judge you for it. This also includes sexual needs. In a healthy relationship both the woman and the man need to satisfied. If your partner doesn’t satisfy you, you need talk to them and let them know what you want, men and women don’t usually like the same thing during sex, that's why communication and trust are so important.

Relationships doesn’t have to be hard, sometimes people say they are but its because they are with the wrong person, when you are in a relationship where there is trust, communication and you both are on the same page, everything flows naturally and the disagreements won’t even matter because the goods things are more by far. Do you want to know how is a good a relationship? Its one when you feel happy and relaxed most of the time, its one where your partner its your best friend, your number one supporter and your confident. Its one when doing things for your partner doesn’t seem like a chore but as a prove of love, if your relationship doesn’t sound like this, then its probably not worth it and you deserve something better.